DISCLAIMER: Now, once again this is a work of ‘Fiction’. Now before you start reading I would like to give a Shout Out to Linda G. Hill! Thanks for providing me with a new perspective on how to make sense of these prompts! It is very much appreciated! 🙂
Once again, this post was inspired to me by ‘The Daily Post‘ October 17th Prompt – Urgent. Enjoy!
2:04AM: ‘FINALLY! I KNOW WHAT TO WRITE!’
‘URGENT!’ The word echoed through my mind. You know, the worst part wasn’t the word itself. Oh no, I had become accustomed to living my life with a degree of urgency. But, the reminder that every morning there is another outstanding bill, that is long overdue never failed to but a damper on my mood.
I always knew that being an adult wasn’t going to be easy, that’s what they all told me. Maybe if I had believed them like I did now, I would’ve made more of a conscious effort to put a stop to it. Or maybe even minimize the damage brought on by my mistakes. Even though I knew it was inevitable.
To be honest, who could’ve predicted that a few minutes of fun could lead to a lifetime of regret? I certainly couldn’t, but I’m guessing the people around me probably could.
I mean, getting pregnant after just completing school wasn’t the best way to start adulthood. Or even ending my adolescence for that matter. Now, five years on I’m working in a job I hate, with a partner I’ve grown weary of and a life that I’ve grown to despise.
Even my son, who I love with every fibre of my being… fails to bring me joy. I go through the mail and stop when I see the letter regarding my appeal to put him up for ‘Adoption’. I can’t be the worst mother in the world, can I? Selfishly keeping my son when his parents really can’t provide for him? That’s not fair on him, and it can be argued that it’s also not fair on me. But, I was used to it. It was my way of living and if there was a chance that he could end up somewhere better. Doing something better, then I’d stop at nothing to see that happen.
There is a part that is gnawing at me as I continue to stare at the papers, and I realise that it’s the love that I have for him. The knowledge that although he was a mistake, he was a beautiful one at that. My thoughts are interrupted by a small voice, that’s almost inaudible.
“Mum, I drew this,” he hands me the picture with a smile beaming from ear to ear. As my eyes are met with the words ‘My Family’ at the top of the page, as my stomach tightens with a sense of guilt and as a result a lump is formed in the back of my throat. As three stick figures are drawn together, in different colours. I sigh, as my eyes pan over the words, ‘Mum, Dad and Me.’ I place the picture down on the table, as I turn to him and embrace him in a hug.
I hear him ask, “What is ‘Urgent?” as he breaks the hug, examining the letter.
“Haha,” I chuckle slightly. “Um… this bill is. Which Mummy has to pay right now. Hopefully you’ll never have to associate yourself with that word.”
He gave me a knowing look and smiled, placed the letter back down onto the table before jumping down and running towards the backyard.
My eyes glazed over the ‘URGENT’ Bill, before reaching the Adoption Papers before finally settling on the picture that had been drawn for me.
I sighed, before I stated in a whispered tone, “No one said that being an adult was easy.”